I recently heard someone say…
“People who hurt other people are doing so because THEY are hurting inside.”
This is so very true.
No one (other than me, of course) is an angel 100% of the time.
In our day to day life, we encounter mean, miserable people who seem more than willing to project their negative energy onto us with harsh words and actions.
The simple truth is this…the people who bring you down are NOT happy people.
When you understand this, you will have (or learn to have) some compassion for them.
But then again, who needs compassion when you can simply stand up for yourself and tell them to F off.
Think about it.
When someone feels good and likes what’s happening in their life, they’re not likely to bring other people down.
When you feel good about yourself, you don’t belittle others. You don’t criticize others.
But when someone feels bad about themself, their life, their situation…regardless if they show it or not, they will easily point out your flaws, pick on you, or speak to you in a way that is disrespectful.
Keep in mind these kinds of people will NEVER admit that their life isn’t awesome, amazing, etc., because that would mean admitting their faults and showing genuine emotion.
Unfortunately, dealing with people like this can eventually bring YOU down.
So why bother?
Maybe it’s because you love them.
Maybe it’s because you have a good heart and are hesitant to give up on someone.
But that isn’t going to help you when the Meanie McMeaningtons of the world probably don’t even realize (or care) about the impact their negativity and selfish actions have on you.
Trying to rationalize with someone who is miserable and negative is like trying to tell a narcissist they’re wrong.
So how do you deal with these kinds of people?
Again, very simple.
You either let them walk out of your life or you walk out of theirs.
Other than that, responding with niceties and apologies will only reinforce their negative behavior.
I have learned this first hand.
Apologizing for things you didn’t do just to keep the peace may be a temporary fix…
But in the end you will only continue to feed the beast, feel defeated, and continue on a great treasure hunt for your backbone.
You know the old saying…
“Tis better to have three friends that are awesome, than thirty three who suck the life out of you.”
(Was that Shakespeare?)
So let’s all do ourselves a favor…think about the people in your life and the impact they have on you.
If they make your heart do cartwheels and fill your life with positive rays of sunshine and energy and all the good stuff that helps you become a better person…then resign the lease.
But if they are a grim reaper of emotions who brings with them a dimly-lit sky full of insults, negative energy and no sign of drive, ambition or desire to become the best version of themselves…show them the curb.
Better yet, take their hand and lead them to it.
Ignore their guilt trips.
Deny their manipulations.
One day they will realize what THEY lost in YOU!
And when that day arrives, you will be long gone…
You will be too busy becoming the best version of yourself, surrounded by people who truly care and appreciate all that you are.
You will be too busy with people who would never take advantage of you and people who TRULY love you.
Because in the end…everyone else is just passing through.